Lego Movie Creepypasta: The Master Builder's Log

Monday:

Hi fellow master builders, it's me, Emmet. It’s been a month since the attack that Rex Dangervest has caused, but today I witnessed something HORRIBLE! I came back to the dream house Lucy and I made with some coffees for my friends and found Queen Waterva, Sweet Mayhem, Ice Cream Cone, and Banarnar sacrificing Unikitty in the living room. There was blood everywhere, like some kind of horror movie. I nearly vomited at the sight. I wanted to tell the others, but Sweet Mayhem cut my legs off with the sword they were using. I’m gonna be their next sacrifice. If you find this, tell Lucy I love her and she can have my poop sock. Goodbye.

Wednesday:

I’m in the hospital now. I thought for sure I was a goner. Lucy, Batman, Benny, and Metalbeard came to visit me. Lucy told me that the police showed up and found me. She told me that after Sweet Mayhem cut off my legs, she, Queen Waterva, Ice Cream Cone, and Banarnar, for no reason, began fighting each other. Blood and organs were flying. Their bodies were so horribly mangled, that nobody could recognize them. The cop told me it was the most GRUESOME scene he had ever seen.

Thursday:

Our dream house is being renovated. I have to live in an orphanage for a while. Everyone there is really mean. They made fun of me because I was disabled. That son of a BITCH Timothy gave me a black eye and pulled out some of my hair. I showed him though, by smothering him. They’re going to find his body in the morning. Hopefully, they won’t blame me for his death.

Friday:

Benny just arrived at the orphanage today. He told me President Business was murdered. When someone found out he subscribed to T-Series instead of Pewdiepie, he straight up killed him and ate his brain. He also told me that earlier he got HIV from Unikitty. Ugh, I told her not to make out with the raptors! Also, my lower half just got an infection. I’m thinking of ending it all.

Saturday:

BENNY IS FUCKING DEAD! I found his body hanging IN MY ROOM! He wrote a death note, but I decided to just throw it away. Life can’t get any worse. I feel like everyone I know is fucking DYING!

Sunday:

Ever since Benny died, my life has gotten worse. I think I might have depression. Batman sent me a gift and a note saying how much he and Alfred miss me. It was his leftover lobster thermidor, which looks like it’s been left out for YEARS! On the good side however, it went great with my peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Monday:

I just got a call from Alfred. He said Batman, or Bruce as he said it, got into the Joker’s bomb attack which caused him to end up in the hospital. He died from choking on his own blood. This all feels like a nightmare.

Tuesday:

THE ORPHANAGE JUST BURNED DOWN! THERE WAS A HUGE EXPLOSION! EVERYONE IS FUCKING DEAD! I managed to escape, but suffered severe blood loss. My life can’t get any worse.

Wednesday:

Me and my big mouth. The cops found out it was ME who caused the orphanage to burn down. I can’t believe this, I was so careful. When the cop arrested me, I said I was going to feed him to the raptors. He thought raptors were extinct though. I hope he likes dying.

Friday:

Finally, I got my Master Builder’s Log back. It’s been a few days in court proving my innocence and guess what? I FUCKING WON! Yeah, luck is finally coming my way. The only thing is that I’m going back to my old apartment.

Saturday:

I JUST GOT STABBED BY THAT BASTARD WHO TOOK MY COFFEE! I DON’T THINK I’M GONNA MAKE IT! IT WAS A WILD RIDE, BUT NOW MY SUFFERING WILL END! GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!

???day: Wednesday:

I have no idea what day it is. I’m in the hospital again. Let me ask the doctor what day it is. They’re going to move me to another orphanage. I don’t think I’ll last there though. I’m just going to end it.

Thursday:

Good news, things might finally be going my way. Just kidding, someone just got fucking GUTTED during lunch hour!

Friday:

Today I had a PTSD flashback. The others were playing baseball and one of them got mad and fucking BASHED some kid’s skull in! Normally I would find this amusing, but then I had a flashback of when Sweet Mayem cut off my legs. I can tell life is going to be pretty hellish from here.

Saturday:

Metalbeard and Lucy arrived at the orphanage today. Metalbeard’s robot body broke down, leaving only his head and guts. Lucy was also on drugs. Right when she got here, she SHANKED someone with a scalpel. I hope she’ll sober up quickly.

Sunday:

Lucy’s got TWO FUCKING GUNS and is on a KILLING SPREE! Bodies are dropping left and right! How many drugs did she take?!

Monday:

Lucy shaved me bald and stabbed me in the chest.

Tuesday:

I’m thinking of killing Lucy. SHE STABBED MY EYE OUT! After that, she ran off. The nurse gave me and eyepatch. Metalbeard told me I don’t look that bad. Well, to you that is, because I look like a fucking pirate like you.

Wednesday:

Metalbeard died today. He drowned in a river next to the orphanage. They found his head and guts floating. I’m not sure if it was a suicide or Lucy killed him. I hope she got eaten by wolves or something. My eye still hurts A LOT! If she didn’t take any drugs, I wouldn’t look like fucking Dan Crenshaw.

Thursday:

Everyone at this orphanage is really nice….well, except for that son of a bitch Nybe Bratch. That might be the STUPIDEST name on Earth! I’m going to get him.

Friday:

Nybe died today. Everyone says he was smothered, but I wouldn’t know anything about that.

Saturday:

These might be my final weeks before the infection spreads to my brain and kills me. I started hacking up blood and smelling like ass today. These are signs that I’m going to die soon. The worst part is that Lucy keeps sending me threatening letters.

Sunday:

Shit, I think I heard someone clawing at the window. It’s Lucy, she’s come back to KILL ME! I hope that bitch can keep up with my mad wheelchair skills! Lucy followed me into the forest. Apparently, she CAN keep up with my mad wheelchair skills. I’ll keep this updated as things happen. Lucy tried to strangle me. At first, I couldn’t overpower her, but I eventually got on top of her and beat her with a spoon. I fucking scooped her eye out. Now she knows what it feels like. She passed out in horror. I’ll wait for her to wake up in the morning to see if she sobers up. Right now, I’ll shave off her hair and dump her drugs in the river.

Monday:

Lucy woke up this morning and had a mental breakdown. She was asking me questions like why I had her hair and why she couldn’t see out of her other eye. I told her she was on drugs and was killing people, which made her start crying. She said she was sorry and she begged me not to call the police. I said I wouldn’t, but instead I smothered her with a pillow. I hope nobody else has to get smothered because it’s tiring on the arms.

Tuesday:

I buried Lucy’s body in the woods and it’s not that easy. Have you ever tried to dig a hole in a wheelchair? The infection won’t stop spreading. In the end, I’m going to die.

Wednesday:

People are starting to catch wind of my murders. After they found Lucy’s body in the woods, they immediately blamed me for her death. I denied it, but it’s only a matter of time before I’m found out.

Thursday:

The police are investigating Lucy and Nybe’s deaths. They found a piece of my shirt. I need to do something or I’m going to be fucked, but what will they do to arrest me? I’m already a dead man in a wheelchair.

Friday:

The police have an ARREST WARRANT after me! They found out about all my murders, EVERYBODY! I haven’t been entirely honest to you fellow master builders. This is my confession, I murdered Unikitty, Queen Waterva, Sweet Mayhem, Ice Cream Cone, Banarnar, Timothy, Benny, Metalbeard, Batman, Lucy, Nybe, and even President Business. Unikitty’s death was an accident and I didn’t mean to kill her. Once Queen Waterva, Sweet Mayhem, Ice Cream Cone, and Banarnar found me disposing of her corpse, I had to kill them to, and framed it as them fighting each other. I couldn’t believe the police and my friends actually bought that crap. After killing them, I cut off my legs to sell the story even more. Now I wish I hadn’t. I’m going to die soon. I don’t want to die, but I will. Fuck, I wish none of this ever happened.

Saturday:

THE COPS FOUND MY APARTMENT! They’re going to bust in! I don’t have a lot of time to write in this, so I’ll make it quick. The cops traced my location back to my old apartment. I’m sure as HELL not gonna let them take me in! I’m gonna do a last stand and hopefully take a few of them with me. This is probably, no this IS my last entry in the Master Builder’s Log. I’m going to jump off the balcony of my apartment. I may not be famous as a master builder anymore, but instead famous as one of the best serial killers. It’s not the way I wanted to be famous, but it’s a way.

NEWS REPORT:

Bricksburg in Shock After It's Deadliest Shooting

'''Bricksburg citizens were shocked after the shooting on Saturday. The shooting involved the police and resulted in 26 killed and 36 injured. The perpetrator, master builder Emmet Brickowski who is now recovering from his wounds in the hospital, then jumped off the balcony of his apartment. He carried with him a tabled known as the "Master Builder's Log". Other master builders have said the Master Builder's Log also details 12 other murders carried out by Brickowski. Brickowski, a disabled bald man with only one eye, also caused the orphanage fire earlier this year, which took the lives of 32 people. "I can't believe Emmet would ever do this!" said Sherrie, one of Brickowski's neighbors. "I thought I could trust him now after that Rex Dangervest incident!" said Balthazar, one of the surviving systarians. No one would have expected a master builder of all people in Bricksburg to commit such heinous acts. It is believed that Brickowski was Alt Right due to the fact he had guns and knew how to use them. Police say they will release the full Master Builder's Log in April of 2019. More details should surface in the coming days, in the meantime we, along with the rest of the town mourn at the deaths of our fellow citizens.'''

Sunday:

Okay, so I survived the fall, but I’m still dying. The doctors said it won’t be long now. I have suffered a lot more severe injuries and I will die in the next few hours. Goddamn cops, they’re guarding me every second. They’re not allowing visitors in. I can’t write in this thing anymore, I’m too weak. Also, it was damaged from the fall, so it will shut down soon. I’m sorry for everything I’ve done. I just wish things could be different. At least when I die, I’ll be a ghost like Vitruvius, and probably like my friends are. Plus, Rex Dangervest won’t exist at all. I love you guys, and I wish I never killed any of you. Remember my fellow master builders, everything is awesome.