Night in the Woods: The Final Night - Part 5

Chapter 5: A View of the Woods
“Alright, now reach, reach, reach, reach…”

Mae blinked awake to the sound of an unfamiliar voice, urging her to reach. She didn’t know what she needed to reach for, but the familiar taupe of the carpet reminded her that she was in the Wartons’ basement. There were no windows in her room, glassy white sunlight drifted under the double doors across from her bed. She patted the bedclothes down for her phone, retrieving it from the pocket of her (no, they were Germ’s) pajama bottoms. The time was 9:34 in the morning. The last time Mae got up that early was for college.

“Now what you want to do next is reach up as high as you can go…” the voice from the other room said. Mae dimly remembered Germ telling her that his older sister exercised on the weekends. Why anyone would spend precious free time sweating and grunting was a complete mystery to her. Then again, that mindset could also explain her own chubby figure.

Mae rolled over and closed her eyes, but it seemed her body had already decided that it was time to start the day, as the black, muffled haze of sleep refused to come back to her. She did go to bed much earlier than usual, thanks to exhaustion and Selmers’ “company,” so it made a little sense that her body had already got the rest it needed. Didn’t make it any less annoying. Mae rolled out of bed and stretched, Germ’s small t-shirt hiking up her torso as she raised her arms. She couldn’t believe she knew someone punier than her.

The cat left her room and went into the bathroom, an unpleasant spark of reminder fizzing in her brain when she saw what little she brought with her. This was all she had left in the world, her phone and some toiletries. She thanked her lucky stars that her manager paid her electronically, so she didn’t lose all of her savings in the fire, but the money she had available was chump change in proportion to all of the things she needed to replace. She swallowed, pushing the growing hollow feeling back into her stomach for now, and began brushing her teeth.

After freshening up and changing into the next set of Germ’s clothes, Mae went out into the sitting room. Or rather, the basement’s sitting room. It still baffled Mae how big Germ’s house was. She went to sit on the couch, looking at the seven or eight remotes sitting in a small wicker basket on the nightstand. One of those might have turned on the chalkboard-sized television, but she wasn’t in the mood to watch anything, her eyelids heavy despite her body not being tired.

“Oh, good morning.”

Mae jumped slightly at the unfamiliar, lilting voice. A door on the other side of the room, past the pool table, stood open, revealing an older bird standing on one leg, her arms raised high in the air. Apparently the exercise room had two entrances.

“I got in after midnight.” The bird said, turning off the speakers that played the exercise mantra Mae heard earlier, stepping out into the sitting room. “I’m Eve Warton, Jeremy’s older sister.”

Eve had blue-green plumage and stood much taller than Germ. She was quite pretty, but Mae could tell that she had some work done. There was no way her bosom was that perfect naturally. She wore a pink tank top and university sweatpants.

“Uh, h-hi, it’s nice to meet you..?” Mae said, keeping her gaze laser-focused on Eve’s eyes for fear of drifting elsewhere. She wasn’t about creeping on other people’s siblings, but her oversized boobs were admittedly quite distracting.

“Daddy told me about what happened. Arson in Possum Springs,” Eve said, putting her hands on her hips with a fluttery sigh. “Whatever happened to loving one’s neighbor?”

“I uh… I don’t- I dunno.” Mae stammered.

“Well, we’re here to help you recover. Is the rest of your family okay?” Eve asked, tilting her head like a curious dog.

“They’re alright. I mean, not happy, but they’re glad I didn’t die.” Mae said with a nervous laugh. Eve joined in with her own rather girlish giggle.

“I’m glad you’re alive too. Jeremy is always so quiet about his friends. Did you know you’re the first person he’s ever brought over to our house?”

“Really?” Mae wasn’t too surprised. Gregg had never been over here, and he was definitely the closest person to Germ.

“Really. For someone that spends so little time at home, he’s so… aloof.” Eve checked her phone and gave a dainty gasp, pressing her hand to her cheek. “Oh, dear, would you look at the time? I better get back to it. Ta-ta!” Eve patted Mae on the head and returned to the exercise room, humming and swaying her hips with a bounce in her step. Mae immediately texted Gregg.

“Dude! Germ’s older sister is weird. She’s like Snow White or something.” she typed out. Gregg responded shortly after.

“Well I mean, this is Germ we’re talking about. His whole family is probably a bit loopy.”

“His house is also effing huge! I’m staying in his basement and it’s… hold on I’ll send a pic!”

Mae snapped a picture of the sitting room, captioning it “This is just the basement!”

“WOW. That’s better than our apartment! Ask him when I can come!”

“I don’t think I’ve even explored all of it, I’m waiting to find the secret passages and swimming pool.” Mae typed.

“Have you asked how his folks can afford all this?” Gregg inquired.

“He just said it wasn’t a big deal, but I’m gonna ask him today. I’m kinda afraid to go upstairs.” Mae replied.

“Why?”

“His Grandma wigs me out. She might, like, ask me if I’m a communist or something.”

Some rapid footsteps echoed faintly in the stairwell, Germ appearing on the landing in a long-sleeved green skating shirt and black jeans. A tuft of dark blue plumage puffed out on the spot where he usually wore his cap.

“Hey Mae. Want some Pop-Tarts?” he asked.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you hatless, Germ.” Mae said.

“We have s’more flavored ones and apple cinnamon ones.” Germ replied.

“Apple cinnamon, please.”

“Okay. Come up and you can put them in the toaster.” Germ said, heading back up the stairs.

“Uh, I don’t toast mine,” Mae said, following Germ out of the basement. “I just eat ‘em right out of the silver thing.”

Germ spun about at the top of the stairs, the light from the doorway behind him creating an almost angelic effect. “You eat raw Pop-Tarts?” he asked, incredulous.

“Yeah?” Mae replied. “They’re good.”

“It’s okay to be wrong.”

Gramma was in the same recliner as the last time Mae saw her, engrossed in the same gigantic novel. Germ’s little sisters, seated at the kitchen counter, looked up from the magazine they were reading simultaneously, waving at Mae.

“Hi Miss Hobo!” one of them said.

“We’re reading about guns.” the other chimed in, holding up the magazine, which had a large advertisement for a pistol.

“Nice.” Mae replied, smiling a bit. Germ went over to the pantry and handed Mae a package of Pop-Tarts, which she began to unwrap.

“Don’t you get crumbs on the rug,” Gramma snapped, nearly making Mae drop the pastries. “Didn’t your mama teach you to open food over the sink?”

“It’s okay, Gramma. Dad eats stuff over here all the time.” one of the twins said.

“Okay, my fanny. That there rug is an antique, straight from Persia! Your father doesn’t respect anything in this goldarn house.” Gramma replied.

“Persia doesn’t exist anymore, Gramma,” the other twin said. “Now they call it Iran. My teacher said.”

“Watch your sass, Riley,” Gramma warned, picking up a nearby drink coaster. “From where I’m sitting, I could hit you with this.”

“I’m Rebecca.” the twin said. “She’s Riley.”

“What if those are antique too?” the other twin, apparently Riley, asked.

“These? Pah! Your grandfather bought these at a flea market. I doubt they’re even worth a dime each.”

Mae had quietly retreated to the sink to eat her Pop-Tarts, Germ taking the opportunity to pull on his sneakers.

“Miss Hobo, why were you crying last night?” Rebecca asked. Mae chewed her food for a while, trying to think of how to respond without frightening the twins. Then again, this was Germ’s family, so it wasn’t too much of a stretch to believe they knew of worse things than a house fire. They were reading a gun magazine, after all.

“I was in a fire, and lots of things that are important to me got destroyed.” Mae said.

The girls then bombarded Mae with questions, somehow managing not to talk over each other:

“How did it happen?”

“How hot was it?”

“Where do you live?”

“Did you get any cool scars?”

Gramma dropped her book into her lap, glaring at the twins. “Good lord, you two! Where’s your sense of tact? You got no business askin’ that poor girl all she’s been through.”

“It’s fine,” Mae said, trying not to mention how Gramma had interrogated her last night. “Not like I’m going to forget anyway. Also, it’s Mae, and I’m not a hobo.”

“But I thought you were homeless, your house got burned down!” Rebecca declared, throwing her arms in the air.

“It didn’t burn all the way down, it was really just my room.” Mae explained.

“Were you smoking in bed?” Riley asked. “Gramma said people that smoke in bed are the reason fires start.”

“I don’t smoke. My friend Bea let me try a cigarette once and I nearly hurled.” Mae replied.

“We know Bea!” the twins said.

“You do?” Mae asked.

“Sure! Germ works for her sometimes,” Riley said. “I think she’s cool.”

“I saw her fixing the big hummy thing on the playground last year.” Rebecca added.

“Duuude, I know exactly what you’re talking about! She fixed that monster?” Mae realized Rebecca was talking about the huge air conditioner attached to the elementary school. It was near the playground by the curvy slide, and made a tremendous rumbling sound whenever it activated, frightening anybody that happened to be nearby.

“That girl…” Gramma muttered.

Mae felt a twinge of anger. She could take insults thrown her way, but no one got away with bad-mouthing her friends except her.

“What’s wrong with her?” Mae asked, with a tone so pleasant it could only be angry.

Gramma met Mae’s fake smile with a neutral expression. The two stared at each other for a while before Gramma looked back at her book. “Well, that girl works harder than anyone in this town. I ain’t seen anyone her age slave away like she does. Her daddy must be real proud.”

Mae held her tongue this time. She had a few choice words about Mr. Santello that were better left unsaid, especially around little kids.

“Ready to go, Mae?” Germ reappeared at the base of the stairs, his usual nylon jacket zipped up and black cap perched at the top of his head.

“Sure. But where are we going?” Mae asked.

“Gregg’s. He and Angus wanted to see you, and I want to play Dark Souls III.” Germ explained.

“Kay.” Mae shoved the rest of her Pop-Tart in her mouth, speaking through it. “I gomfa get my boofs.” She pointed to her boots when Germ gave her a confused blink.

“Heaven’s sake, chew your food, girl.” Gramma chided. “And Jeremy, don’t you wander around after dark. Promise your Gramma you’ll be home by sundown.”

“Stick a needle in my eye.” Germ replied, giving his grandmother a brief hug goodbye. “Follow me, Mae.” The little bird opened the door to the balcony outside.

“Bye Miss Hobo!” the twins said, waving to her.

“Bye Germ’s Sisters.” Mae replied with her own wave and smirk. She went out on the balcony, Germ shutting the door behind them. The balcony provided a view of Germ’s backyard, a steady downward slope of long, tangled grass leading into a thicket of pine trees. Mae’s brow wrinkled with confusion when she realized that there was no staircase or any other means to get down from the balcony.

“Germ, what are we doi-” Mae’s question dissolved into a gasp of horror. In the brief time they had been out there, Germ had already climbed onto the balcony railing, and Mae witnessed him jump out of sight, at least a two story drop to the earth below. Mae dashed to the balcony and looked straight down. The bird landed shoulder-first on a large, black disc that bounced him back up with the sound of creaking springs. He made a swift mid-air turn and landed unscathed on his rear end.

“Come on, it’s fun!” Germ hollered up from the trampoline, a faint smile ghosting across his beak. Mae caught her breath and glared at her friend.

“You scared the shit out of me!” she cried. “You know there’s such thing as a door, right?”

“My bike’s down here.” Germ replied, scooting off the trampoline. He then looked up at Mae, tucking his hands into his pockets. Mae took a short breath before climbing onto the railing and looking down at the trampoline. She should have felt safer than when she jumped into the riverbed with Germ in November, since this was a guaranteed soft landing, but this was a longer drop. And if she somehow missed, she’d be searching for all of her shattered teeth in the grass. From where she stood, the trampoline looked quite small.

“Do you trust me?”

Germ asked her this question just before he leapt off of the bridge last autumn. She had trusted him then, and she couldn’t even see if he was still alive. Now here he was, looking up at her without a glimmer of worry. He had let Mae into his house and given her his clothes. Yeah, now that she thought about it, she did trust Germ. A lot.

With a shriek, she flung herself off of the balcony, cool morning air whistling past her ears and ruffling through her clothing. She tilted backwards in mid-air and landed on her butt, the springs of the trampoline yelping in surprise at Mae’s larger frame. The cat was launched a good six feet upward, flailing her arms for balance in a way that would have made Gregg proud. She ended up landing on her back, bouncing two more times before coming to a stop.

“Heh… Hehahahaha!” Mae burst out laughing as soon as the shock wore off, kicking her feet in the air. Germ laughed with her, something Mae hadn’t seen before. He had a high, flutey laugh.

“You good?” Germ asked after a moment.

“I good. That was great!” Mae replied. “Is that how you practiced jumping off the bridge?”

“No, I did that before we even got the trampoline. Come on, I wanna show you my bike.”

Germ led Mae over to the small alcove beneath their porch, where a silver bicycle was tethered to one of the wooden posts with a fancy-looking combination lock.

“Shiny. Don’t most people leave theirs in like, a garage? Not to stomp on your family traditions or anything.”

“Not enough room in my garage.” Germ said, entering the combination for the lock with one thumb.

“Dad and Sean need the space for car stuff.”

“Sean?” Mae asked.

“My oldest brother. He’s on the road crew in Saltztown.” Germ said.

“...Germ, how many people live at this house?” Mae asked.

“Me, Mom, Pop, Gramma, Eve, Sean, Perch, Rebecca, and Riley. Nine people.”

“What the actual hell? I’m not sleeping in someone’s bed, am I?” Mae asked.

“Nah. We save the basement for guests only.” Germ unlatched his bicycle and hopped aboard. “You can take Eve’s bike.”

Germ pointed to another bicycle tethered to a wooden post. Before Mae had the chance to ask if it was okay to borrow Eve’s things, he was already pedaling up the hill into the front yard. Mae grabbed the handlebars and hoisted herself onto the taller bike, having to duck to avoid whacking her head on the balcony above her. After some fidgeting with the seat, she figured out how to get it low enough to actually reach the pedals, and began following Germ.

It had been forever since she went bike riding, but it felt just as good as she remembered. Possum Springs was a flat town, meaning one could glide around just about anywhere on a bicycle without having to slog up too many inclines. The only hill Mae could remember was the one on Maple Street right by her house. And even then, that hill was cake compared to the payoff of rocketing down it at top speed. She and Gregg used to race to the top and then race all the way back down almost half a dozen times in a row. Sure, they got honked at by passing cars and Gregg once crashed into a telephone pole, but that didn’t stop them. What did finally stop Mae was when she skidded into the curb and was launched into Mr. Twigmeyer’s gardenia bush. She was unscathed, but she popped the front tire of her bike, and her parents had no idea how to replace it, so she stopped riding.

Germ was riding in lazy circles at the bottom of his driveway, coming to a stop as Mae coasted up beside him.

“Try not to ditch me, okay?” Mae said.

“Yup. Follow me.” Germ said, kicking off the driveway and pedaling in front of Mae. He handled his bicycle with the grace of a dancer, every movement looking fluid and deliberate. Mae kept up a leisurely speed behind him, enjoying Germ’s little performance.

“So I ran into your sister this morning,” Mae called. “She seems pretty chill.”

Germ performed a seamless U-Turn, looping behind Mae and riding up alongside her. “Eve thinks about sex a lot.”

“Dude, me too.” Mae replied.

“Like, all the time. She used to get in trouble for it at school.” Germ said, gliding around a pothole.

“How do you get in trouble for thinking about sex?” Mae asked.

“She’d skip class to be with boys, and she got busted for having something gross in her backpack,” Germ said. “She got suspended for a week. Guys at school used to tease me about it.”

“Oh. Geez, sorry.”

“It’s okay. She still talks to a doctor every month, but she’s better now.” Germ made a sudden right turn. “This way.”

Mae took the lead down a clean dirt path into the woods. “It’s pretty out here. I didn’t know they made a bike trail.” she said, looking up at the flashes of white sunlight through the black forest canopy.

“Perch and I cleared it a few summers ago. I got really bad poison ivy on my eyelid. Have you ever thought about kissing friends?”

“Have I ev- WHOA!” Mae ducked a low-hanging branch just in time, twisting the handlebars of her bike with a loud screech and toppling to the earth. The front tire of Eve’s bicycle twirled in the air as Mae dusted herself off.

“I forgot that branch was still there.” Germ said, riding up beside Mae.

“I’ll take getting dirty over getting clotheslined.” Mae said, picking up Eve’s bicycle and checking for any damage.

“Looks good to me,” Germ said, taking what couldn’t have been more than glance at the bicycle. “I can lead if you want.”

“Wait wait, Germ, wait,” Mae demanded, waving her paws about. “What did you ask me before?”

Germ had to think a moment. “Oh. Yeah. Have you ever thought about kissing friends?”

“Sure. But why?” Mae asked.

“I’ll tell you on the way.” Germ kicked off the forest floor and began pedaling, Mae stammering before giving chase. He was quiet for a moment or two before speaking up. “I’ve never been kissed by anyone. Like, really kissed. And sometimes I think about what it would be like if I kissed Gregg or Angus.”

“Dude, that’s like, the normalest thing on the planet. I’ve thought about it too.”

“What do you think it would be like?” Germ asked.

“Nice, I guess. Angus would probably feel all fuzzy, Gregg’s got shaggier hair… You could always ask Gregg! He’s like, the chillest.”

“Nah. I don’t want them to think I’m gay.” Germ said.

“So what if you are? Bea’s the only one in our crew that’s straight, and even then I bet she’s open to experimentation.”

“Why?” Germ asked.

“Tell ya later. What’s so bad about thinking you’re gay?”

“I don’t know if I’m gay.” Germ replied. “And if people think I am, then they’ll get upset if I turn out not to be.”

“What?! That makes none of the sense!” Mae cried.

“People always yell at each other online if that happens.” Germ said.

“Yeah, online. A lot of people hide online because they can say whatever shitty things they want without anyone they know in real life finding out how rotten they are.” Mae pedaled harder and rode up alongside Germ. “Dude, none of us would care if you turned out to be gay or bi or whatever, or if you changed your mind. It’s all a part of getting old.”

“So would you kiss me?” Germ asked.

Mae blinked, looking at Germ. She was met by his usual neutral expression, impossible to read but asserting that this person meant whatever crazy thing they just said.

“Uh… ...nooo?” Mae said, glancing from side to side. “I mean, I can’t. I got Selmers.”

“Okay. Sorry.” Germ said, looking back at the trail.

“No, wait a second!” Mae exclaimed. “Where did that come from, Germ? You know about me and Selmers.”

“I know. But I don’t know any other girls. And I didn’t mean ‘kiss’ kiss. I meant just a kiss between friends.” Germ said.

“A kiss between friends.” Mae repeated, as though she were a patient repeating the bizarrely-named disease a doctor said she contracted.

“Just once. No tongue or lip biting or anything.” Germ explained.

“Germ…” Mae squeezed the brakes on her bike, grinding to a stop on the soft dirt. Germ stopped as well, looking back at her. “Look, duder… You’re a great guy for letting me stay with you and stuff. And I’ll do whatever you need or talk about anything with you, shit, I’ll start paying rent. But I can’t just kiss you. I’d be kissing someone behind my girlfriend’s back, which is super scummy even if I didn’t mean it. It might be even worse that way. You’re one of the most badass people I know, but if I kiss you, I could lose Selmers, and… I’ve already lost a lot.”

Germ dug into the dirt with the toe of one of his shoes. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright, dude,” Mae said, not making eye contact with the bird. “You can talk to me whenever you need.”

The two of them rode on, keeping silent for the rest of the trip.