Thread:Suomynona404/@comment-89.66.3.155-20170517072058/@comment-29417957-20170517195458

You added some details, but the details fail to be scary.

Also, the pasta contains two overused cliches:

1. The narrator steps over a tape just lying on the ground.

2. The characters go crazy and start killing each other.

The pasta is a little bit better, but it is still very cliche.

If you need further help on improving your pasta, please go here.

I hope this helps.